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09 January 2012 @ 09:43 pm
the year  
Well shit, before I get into 2012 to0 far I might as well say something about 2011.

2011 started out by being betrayed and abused by some one I thought I loved. Used by some one I thought I could love. Attempting to share my heart with some one whose heart was at capacity. Then rescued by some one I will never stop loving. But this man was stolen away from me, and much of our time together in 2011 was spent in voice and empty hands. Lonely.

I lost some friends in 2011, but they were never friends to begin with.

I also graduated college with my Anthropology Undergrad from Colorado University. I remember sleeping in my car during finals week and using the gym to shower. I was too ashamed to ask friends for help with the drama that kept me from home.
This fall without school has been unnerving and empty. I miss school so much that my heart aches. I want to pursue my masters.

I attended a shit ton of conventions and events. Highlights: San Fran, Wasteland Weekend, Phoenix Comic Con and SDCC. Made a handful of costumes. Yet the event that stands out the most to me during this year is the fact my wallet was stolen. Sucks. But my friends took care of me. Awesome.

I lost my grandmother and a mentor in 2011. I was unable to attend either funerals - not do to money, but other constraints not under my control. I will forever feel guilt.

If I could visualize 2011 accurately, I'd draw it like a roller coaster, and I think for 2012 I would start with a line drawing of myself walking away with a grin. In the end I learned a lot from a bumpy ride, but the ride is just that, temporary. Flat ground ahead.

For 2012 I would like to:
Get to my weight goal. No big surprise here. Being able to run more than a mile would be great.
Spent obnoxious amounts of time with my Sergent when he gets home. I want to lay in bed with him for a week straight. I want to smell his cologne and hear him laugh in person...
Finish at least one costume a month.
Find a new home, a new place to start. Get the hell out of this apartment. Job preferably coming with scenario.
Get the Rainbow Boa my man is so excited to get.
Maybe be self employed for a while.

In 2012 I am:
Going to HAWAII. Holly fucking christ I'm excited. Fucking Hawaii.
Narrowing down convention attendance to the big ones and one or two local affairs. (SDCC, Dragon*Con and Celebration 6)
Going to more music and outdoor festivals. Lightning in a Bottle. 2012.
Cry like a fucking baby when my man gets home, probably in front of people or cameras. I'm going to be a runny nosed red faced slob. And I don't care.